<BR> "John Ramsey's Confession...50 percent of people think I had something to do with it." <P> While Patsy Ramsey endured another last ditch chemotherapy treatment, her husband John went to church to talk about<BR>JonBenet. <P> Although he has given interviews to carefully selected TV shows and networks before, he had not stood up in front of a group of<BR>ordinary people and talked about the tragedy. <P> "A Gallup poll showed that more than 50 percent of the world think I had something to <BR> do with JonBenet's death," he confessed. I'm not sure I understand why." <P> Amazingly, Ramsey also told about 100 members of a Sunday school class in Atlanta <BR> that the brutal murder of the 6-year old beauty queen was NOT the worst experience of <BR> his life. He claims JonBenet's death was just "a stepping stone" to finding an increased faith and trust in God.) <P> "Ten years ago, my daughter Beth was killed in an auto accident in Chicago, where she <BR> had gone to meet the family of her boyfriend," Ramsey revealed during his speech at <BR> the gigantic Church of the Apostles on May 5th. <P> "That was the lowest point of my life. It was also the turning point. I asked, "How could God let this happen? I had gone to<BR>church and <BR> considered myself a Christian. I thought I was protected by God." <P> <BR> Wearing a dark blue blazer, tan slacks and a maroon striped tie, Ramsey talked for about half an hour and showed few signs of<BR>grief as he calmly talked about hte deaths of this two daughters. <P> "I know that Satan exists," he told parishoners. <P> With a benign smile on his face, he recalled that he was a casual Christian until Beth's <BR> death. As he retreated spiritually and emotionally in grief and bitterness after the tragic car crash, he took the advice of a<BR>longtime pal and attended a religious retreat in <BR> Colorado, where he had a "vision" of the Lord. <P> "He was not the somewhat meek, long-haired almost hippie type that I had seen in so <BR> many paintings and pictures," Ramsey said. "He appeared as very rugged and strong." <BR> <BR> Later, he told the churgoers that he did not cry out and ask how God could let JonBenet <BR> die. <P> "I knew there ws such evil in the world that could do this to a small child," said <BR> Ramsey, 58. "People keep asking me why this happened." <P> As he stared down at the podium, JonBenet's father added in a hoarse whisper, "I say I don't know." <P> Before ending his speech and sitting alone in a side pew for the formal church service, <BR> Ramsey told his spellbound audience that his trust in God is still growing, despite all <BR> the pain he has endured. <P> "The big house, the big bank account and the job are all gone now," he said with a grin. <BR> "I look forward to and have hope for the future, for without continued hope in life, there <BR> is only death in front of us."